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Kindness Korner

Merry X-MAS


 X-MAS
When I was a child I was told that to write X-mas instead of Chistmas was bad. X-mas was, the teachers said, an unbelievers way of having "Christmas" but leaving Christ out.
My children, thirty years later, carry home the same woeful tale.
Guess what! It isn't true! For one thing the X in X-mas isn't really an X. It is the Greek letter chi(ki), transliterated as kh and representing the Greek word Khristos, which is Christ, of course.
So X-mas is really Christmas too. If you don't believe me look up X-mas in the dictionary. Uh, unfortunately, you have to look it up under the letter X.
IXTHUS
Speaking of Greek, do you know what IXTHUS means? It is the Greek word for fish. So what!? Well now for the first time you may understand why a fish is a well-known symbol of Christianity. Here is why: the first letter of the Greek word for fish is the first letter of the Greek word for Jesus, (I) lesus. The second letter X, stands for the word Xristos (Christ). The two letter TH stand for THEOS (GOD). The U stands for the Greek word for Son (Uios). The final letter S stands for the Greek word Savior (soterios).
Put it all together and the letters of the word give this message:
I - Jesus X - Christ TH - god's U - Son S - Savior
So IXTHUS (FISH) = a symbol of Christianity,
J.K.

Merry Christmas!!!!!

I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day
by Henry Wadsworth Longfellow, 1864
(written four months before the close of the Civil War)

I heard the bells on Christmas Day 
Their old familiar carols play, 
And wild and sweet the words repeat 
Of peace on earth , good will to all.

Then pealed the bells more loud and deep: 
"God is not dead, nor does he sleep;
  The wrong shall fail,
the right prevail 
With peace on earth good will to all."

Apple Inc. (I-Pad, I-Pod, McIntosh Computers) Steve Job's Last Words




                                Steve Jobs Last words:  "Oh, wow!  Oh, wow!  Oh, wow!  Oh, wow!"
    

The Twelve Days of Christmas


 
 This is the meaning of the Christmas Carol "Partridge in a Pear Tree" also known as 
The Twelve Days of Christmas

     There is one Christmas Carol that has always baffled  me, says Dave Cook.
     What in the world do leaping lords, French hens,
     swimming swans, and especially the partridge who won't
     come out of the pear tree have to do with Christmas?
     Today I found out.
    From 1558 until 1829, Roman Catholics in England
    were not permitted to practice their faith openly. Someone during that era wrote this carol as a catechism song     for young Catholics. It has
    two levels of meaning -- the surface meaning plus a hidden meaning known only to members of their     church.     Each element in the carol has
    a code word for a religious reality which the children could remember:
 
     The partridge in a pear tree was Jesus Christ.
     Two turtledoves were the Old and New Testaments.
     Three French hens stood for Faith, Hope and Love.
     The four calling birds were the four gospels of Matthew, Mark, Luke and John.
     The five golden rings recalled the Torah or Law, the first five books of the Old Testament.
     The six geese a-laying stood for the six days of creation.
     Seven swans a-swimming represented the sevenfold gifts of the Holy Spirit: Prophesy, Serving,     Teaching,          Exhortation, Contribution, Leadership, and Mercy.
     The eight maids a-milking were the eight beatitudes.
     Nine ladies dancing were the nine fruits of the Holy Spirit: Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness,      Faithfulness, Gentleness, and  Self Control.
 
     The ten lords a-leaping were the Ten Commandments.
     The eleven pipers piping stood for the eleven faithful disciples.
     The twelve drummers drumming symbolized the twelve points of belief in the Apostles' Creed.
 
So, there is your history for today. This knowledge was shared with me and I found it interesting and enlightening -- and, now I know how that strange song became a Christmas Carol.—Dave Cook
 



 

Where Beautiful Things Originate



                   "My compositions spring from my sorrows.
Those that give the world the greatest delight were born of  my deepest grief."
                                                                                             Franz Schubert

The X in Christmas ---- Merry Xmas!


Cross Marks the Spot in 'Xmas'
      “Merry Xmas”  “Big Xmas sale!” Xmas,  is firmly established as a commercialism.  We tend to place it in the same class as nite or hi (for high):  abbreviations contrived largely for  the convenience of advertisers. But Xmas is a more interesting case. It is a classic example of a symbol  firmly established for one purpose being preempted for an entirely different one.
      The X in Xmas is the Greek letter chi (pronounced ky)  In Greek chi is the first letter in Christ--a point that is lost when the Greek is transliterated into English as Christos or Kristos.  X (the Greek and Roman letters are identical in print) is also a symbol for the cross- a usage that survives quite independently of any religious significance in traffic signs: PED XING.
      For over a thousand years X symbolized Christ.  The Irish refused to use the Roman X because it would be disrespectful to Christ. So common was the understanding of this symbol that non-Christians who wanted to preserve their cultural identity took pains to avoid it. The Chinese altered their coins to remove anything resembling an X. They saw an inviolable symbol of the Western religion and, Western influence.  Early in this century,  illiterate Jewish immigrants arriving at Ellis Island often refused to sign their names with an X because of its strong Christian associations.
      Xmas itself has a long history as an English idiom. The Oxford English Dictionary, in about 1920, defined it simply as a "common abbreviation in writing of Christmas.”  The first use cited in the OED is from 1551,spelled as X’temmas.  The poet Coleridge used it twice in letters, in 1799 and 1801. The last use cited in the OED is from the popular British magazine Punch in 1884. We can see the secularizing trend at work: "He's beginning Xmassing already.
      The wholesale expropriation of Xmas as a commercial term, however, has been chiefly an American Phenomenon.  Christmas itself had rather inauspicious beginnings in this country. In 1659 the General  Court of Massachusetts passed a law which imposed a fine on "anybody who is found observing, by abstinence from labor, feasting, or any other way, any such days as Christmas Day."  These were Puritans, keep in mind, who were inclined to take evidence that anyone might be having a good time as a sign of ”popery."  While the celebration of Christmas as a holiday was widely accepted by the time of the Revolution, Christmas as a commercial holiday had to wait until after the Civil War. Gift giving,  a rare and personal convention at the beginning of the 19th Century, started to become a social obligation.  R.H.Macy’s department store in New York City stayed open until midnight on Christmas Eve for the first time in 1867. Macy's first Christmas window appeared in 1874.
      Christmas grew into what has been called "a spectacular nationwide Festival of Consumption."  Christmas advertising grew with it, but they did not need to invent a new abbreviation for the nine-letter word denoting the season. They simply used one that had been around for centuries. In less than 100 years the usage of well over 1,000 years was largely reversed. What once nearly everyone took to be a religious symbol, today nearly everyone regards as a secular symbol.

      Stan Freberg did a novelty song several years ago, I think it was called "Green Christmas," in which he asked the musical question: “Who put the X in Xmas?”

God in a Cave?


GOD IN A CAVE
     Those who study such things closely insist that the manger of Jesus' birth was in a cave and not in a barn-like structure. It really doesn't matter. But there is something fanciful in the thought of His coming as a cave-dweller. We are reminded of those cavemen of ancient history of whom we see traces by finding drawings of animals on the walls of their former homes. 
     And now we have another drawer of animals. He who traced the shape of animals and man and brought them to life now is found in a cave Himself. What a paradox! The hands that made the sun and stars are now too small to reach the heads of the cattle. On this paradox our faith is built. It is such an extreme conjunction-the world creator and a baby boy, omnipotence and impotence, divinity and infancy. It is such a remarkable combination that a million repetitions cannot make it sound trite or common. Perhaps it is one of the few circumstances qualifying for the title "unique", (cf, G.K. Chesterton:
Orthodoxy).
     The common man has been wrong in many things throughout history. Devoted people have been scorned by the educated cosmopolitans who deal with lofty thoughts, cold reasoning, logical conclusions and unfathomable abstractions. But the common man was close to being correct when in his pagan worship he had been promoting the idea that divinity could be seen and could live in the limits of time and space. For in the cave where the manger was. God was dwelling. God in a cave. It is a revolution, the world is turned upside down. Heaven is on earth, or under the earth, in a cave, in Jesus.

A Major Mistake When Helping the Hurting

When visiting someone who is in grief, or who has recently been hit by a distressing or unsettling event there is a major temptation. It is to think you have to fix the problem, give a solution, provide a remedy.  Sometimes the answer folks give is a Scripture verse or Biblical wisdom.  Even those may be untimely.

Remember the old formula:  "90% of Helping is Just Showing Up".  There is the medicine everyone needs.  It is Love.  Answers, fixes, solutions and remedies may be politely received but they seldom fit.   Giving such  supposed help may make the giver feel as if she is doing something but they are almost always inappropriate.

Show up!  Act interested.  Listen.  Touch.  Smile a little.  Weep with those who weep.  Rarely stay more than an hour (twenty minutes or less if the person is sick). Listen. Listen. Listen..

Remember, God heals.  Your presence, not your "fixing" words, is love, and that love is part of God's healing presence.  God will heal them.  You show up.

Understanding Grief

Grief is normal.

Normal, Predictable Components of Grief 

Immediately:   When the Loss Happens, or is Learned About:  Shock and Denial ("that can't be true").

Then: Suffering 
1.  We express emotion--tears of sadness, fear, panic, helplessness.
2.  We may feel depressed and very lonely.
3.  Physical symptoms of distress may be felt.
4.  We may become anxious and firghtened about going on with life.
5.  There may be a sense of guilt about the loss.
6.  Hostility and resentment may fill our heart and mind.
7.  We may feel unable to return to our usual activities-friendships, work, church.

Eventually:  Recovery 
1.  Gradually we return to our feet and resume our normal functioning.
2.  We struggle to adjust to reality, to live with a new normal.
3.  Painful feelings about the loss may remain for many years, even though life has resumed. 

The length and intensity of each condition varys with each individual.  Most people go back and forth between the various feelings and conditions.  When friends think you are not suffering you may still be in shock and denial. 
When friends think you are recovered you may be quietly still deep in suffering. 

Whatever the stage you are in the arms of Jesus are around you.  Jesus is weeping with you.

Hugging is Healthy

            It Relieves Tension

               It Combats Depression

                  It Reduces Stress

            It Improves Blood Circulation

               It's Invigorating

                  It Elevates Self-Esteem

            It Generates Goddwill

               It Has No Unpleasant Side Effects

                  It is Nothing Less than a Miracle Drug!

Wonderful Words of Life



"Let us love one another, for love comes from God.  Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God.  God is Love.  Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another.  If we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us.

A Lesson We All Need


EGO DETACHMENT
Inability to speak your opinions and ideas in public is often due to a simple problem.  Ego attachment.  The solution is detachment.
It’s as if your idea or what you’d like to say is you.  Your worthwhileness as a person is connected to a mere thought or point of view.  So if it is ignored, disapproved of, or voted down, you go down with it.  When your well-being as a human being is dependent on others “applauding” or liking what you say, it’s obvious you will be very careful.  You will be reluctant to speak.  You will be frightened to express yourself.
Paralyzed in this way by fear you will keep many good thoughts to yourself.  Resentment, jealousy, hostility, depression may follow.  A kind of sickness of spirit from excessive ego attachment.  Too much mistaken notion that your value as a person is dependent on being “right on”.
Recognizing this you can begin to detach your ego from your statements.  Realizing that your value is independent of people liking or even listening to what you have to say, you can begin to contribute.
Usually this means beginning by overriding a lot of feelings with a determination to do what you are now convinced is true.  In spite of fear, uneasiness, apprehension – breaking out into a new involvement, a gratifying fresh creativeness.
Jesus said “Woe to you when all people think well of you . . .”  Luke 6:26
P.S. This  is a message to myself mostly.

It was Merely a Touch of the Hand


The Power of a Touch
At the recent 50+ dinner/entertainment event something happened I want to tell you about. During the dinner I had strolled around the tables greeting and chatting with the diners, joking and kidding most of the time. 

A few weeks after that dinner I met a handsome older man (turned out he is 82 years old) who told me he had been present that day.  He then told me something that thrilled me to the depths of my soul, and stunned me with its importance.  He said that I had walked past him when he was sitting at a table and that I had laid my hand ever so briefly on his shoulder, as I went by.  Then he added “That touch absolutely blessed me!” And he said a little more about what a strong moment that had been.

A touch as I walked by!  So small!  So appreciated!  A touch?!  And he was moved, his spirits were lifted, his mood was changed.

Again I am jolted into awareness of the importance of our Care and Kindness campaign.  This is life changing business.  This is spreading spiritual medicine everywhere we go.  And anyone and everyone is able to take part.  It takes so little to heal a soul

Joy will Come in the Morning


“You Who Weep, Will Laugh.”

An ancient guru is reputed to have inquired of  disheartened and dispirited people, those who were knowing no pleasure or joy in life--  “When did you stop dancing?  When did you stop singing?”

By this unique line of exploration he often arrived at the origin of their unhappiness.   Their loss of vitality often harked back to a major grief in their lives; the death of a dear one, loss of a job or fortune, a significant illness, or some other major blow.

Some didn’t even realize they had stopped singing or dancing, which this teacher regarded as the symbols of loss of joy.  Their zest for life had just quietly trickled away leaving them dry, dispirited shadows, of their old selves.

Grief can do that.  It can slowly drain us of our vitality.

Jesus says, “Blessed are you who mourn for you shall be comforted.”  That is the version in Matthew’s Gospel.  Luke puts it this way:  “Blessed are you who weep now, for you will laugh.”  This is The Lord Jesus’ promise:  healing and happiness can follow mourning.  Proper, natural weeping, and sorrow, leads to renewal.  Weep first, laugh later, Jesus implies.  Psalm 30 puts it this way:  “weeping may remain for a night, but rejoicing comes in the morning.”

This teaching of Jesus creates a safe place to be real, which is a must for proper mourning.  Also, knowing the Lord weeps with us is a major encourager, as we shed our tears and grieve.  Jesus said “Inasmuch as it [happens] to the least of these my little ones, it happens to me.”   Psalm 23 helps with these thoughts:  “Yea though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil for you are with me.” 

Little comforts as much as kind people “walking with us”, “sitting with us”, “weeping with us”.  They are the Lord’s presence, embracing the hurting.  Joy then comes “in the morning”.        

The Value of a Good Night of Sleep


IT’S EASIER TO LIVE BY FAITH IF YOU’VE HAD A GOOD NIGHT’S SLEEP

Sometimes cutting short your sleep to commune with God may, in fact, undermine your ability to live close to God.  A tired person is more vulnerable to temptations than the wide-awake.  The weakened body is more apt to be plagued with self-doubt than one fed and rested.

Quiet times for prayer, meditation and reflection aid the Christian walk, but the notion that “more of the same” will continue to produce positive results is faulty.

The spiritual growth we aspire to cannot take place separate from sound care for the whole person. 
·        It’s easier to feel close to God when the Excedrin has taken my headache away.
·        Faith soars when the air is fresh and I’m biking briskly on a bright spring morning.
·        After a cup of coffee my spiritual condition is always improved.

Spiritual inspiration and enthusiasm can be mediated by physical interventions and activities.  Faith-builders will not only implore their adherents to worship in the traditional forms, including Bible study, prayer, meditation and song.  They will also encourage the health-care of the body, spirit and emotions through exercise, vacations and travel, hospitality, friendship.  Spiritual growth is also the product of good-deed projects, enjoyment of the arts, folk-dance, the appreciation of beauty in nature and craftsmanship, ecology efforts, reading, hobbies, gardening.

Confident that “everything affects everything else” the growing Christian will be one designing a well-rounded life-style.  Spirit-raising pastimes can bring us closer to God-pleasing service.




The Empty Cross


The Gold Cross at the Front of the Church

WHEN I WAS SITTING IN CHURCH LAST SUNDAY I LOOKED AT THE BEAUTIFUL GOLD CROSS AT THE FRONT OF THE SANCTUARY.  IT HIT ME.  AMONG OTHER TRUTHS THE CENTRAL TRUTH THAT IS SO POWERFULLY IMPORTANT IN THE CROSS OF JESUS IS THE FACT THAT HE SHOWS US, BY DEATH ON THE CROSS, WHAT LOVE REALLY IS.  IT IS DYING FOR ANOTHER PERSON.

EVERYTIME YOU INCONVENIENCE YOURSELF, MOVE OUT OF YOUR COMFORT ZONE, BOTHER TO GENERATE A WORDOF ENCOURAGEMENT, FRIENDLINESS, INTEREST, you are doing a Christ-like action. DRAW SOMEONE IN AND SUPPORT THEM, GO OUT OF YOUR WAY, EVEN JUST A LITTLE BIT, YOU’RE PARTICIPATING IN THE KIND OF LOVE JESUS TAUGHT.  YOU ARE DYING FOR ANOTHER PERSON.  AND THAT GIVES THEM LIFE AND LIGHT AND GENERATES RESURRECTION IN THEIR SOULS--- YOU HAVE BEEN GIVEN LIFE.  You can give life.

Self-Centeredness is Unnecessary


Beware of the Infection of Self-Centeredness

As we grow older there is a tendency to drift into preoccupation with ourselves: our health, our physical problems, our sleep, money, trips, grandchildren and more.  The process also may include losing interest in others—their trips, interests, accomplishments, new items.

There is little as pleasant as another person taking interest in our lives.  So it is essential that as we grow older, and the self-centered drift progresses, that we resist it.  It often requires a deliberate decision to move in that direction.
Not only does such a choice thrill the ones we show interest in, it is also an antidote against an older-person malady (me-ism) that turns others off.

Becoming a giver may require upgrading our self-concept.  We must believe this truth—“I am a reservoir of blessings”.  We are all full of goodness and must be ready to overflow with nourishment for the souls of younger folks. 

It doesn’t matter who you are, or how healthy, educated, wealthy or attractive.  You have within you words, interest, stories and expressions that can make a wonderful positive difference in the lives of younger men and women.  We are all potential healers. Check that self-centered drift, and spill loving interest on some young ones.  It can be life-giving to them, but it will always be spirit-lifting to us as well.

AS WE GROW OLDER WE MUST DELIBERATELY TAKE THE SPOTLIGHT OFF OURSELVES AND TURN IT ON OTHERS.
       

Soft Answers


A SOFT ANSWER DOES TURN AWAY WRATH


It’s reassuring to doubters, such as I, to find science reinforcing Biblical ideas.  Here’s a new development I read about in Time magazine:

A SOFT ANSWER DOES TURN AWAY WRATH, according to the results of a four-month study of unruly children who were discipline problems in school.  Normal and loud teacher reprimands that could be heard by the whole class had no effect on the disruptive behavior of such children.  When the teachers switched to soft reprimands that could be heard only by the child being corrected, most of the unruly children misbehaved less often.  A return to loud reproaches resulted in an increase in poor behavior, and later return to soft corrections again resulted in better behavior.

We who take the Bible so literally might try putting some of its very concrete suggestions into practice – starting with this one.

Proverbs 15:1  A soft answer turns away wrath,
                        But a harsh word stirs up anger.

The Crucifix is Powerful

The Importance of The Crucifix
The empty cross, the one on which Jesus died, is the outstanding symbol of Jesus’ dying for us.  Jesus was removed from that terrible device, and placed in a tomb which was then sealed and guarded.   Then Easter!  Easter is the heart of Christian life.  Death is defeated!  A new age is inaugurated.  The resurrection of the body is now an event we celebrate and anticipate.  So the Cross is properly vacant.  Christ is risen!  He is not hanging on the cross.
While the simple vacant cross is a powerful message The Crucifix, Jesus on the Cross, carries powerful and important teaching.  Looking at the Lord Jesus hanging there in terrible agony announces God’s love in a powerful way.  It speaks a message sometimes overlooked when we focus on the cross without Jesus on it.  It is the message of God’s love, God’s pain.  It is a graphic proclamation of total love.
It is appropriate and good to appreciate and love the Crucifix.  It is a lesson about love.  What greater love is possible than that—dying, voluntarily. Yes, being put to death, in a terribly painful way, on behalf of others. That is love!  And it shows us in the extreme what the bottom line in our own lives must be.  We are called to live that way too- not go to the cross literally but we are urged to leave our comfortableness to help others. 
Every time we reach out and lift another person in some way we are dying for them.  Every tiny, medium sized, or major action of giving up time, money, energy, a preference, to help someone else is a form of dying for others.  When we focus on the dying Jesus, The Crucifix, we see a reminder of where our lives must be aimed.  The Crucifix graphically speaks of true love. 
Jesus said:  “If anyone desires to come after me, let them deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me.  For whoever desires to save their life will lose it, and whoever loses their life for my sake will find it.”  (Mt. 16:24).  That is the remarkable thing in all this.  We find meaning, purpose, vitality, and hopefulness, in carrying the agenda of dying for others, every day of the week.  We come to life in fresh ways ourselves when we lift others in any way with words, or kindness, with friendliness or interest, with admiration or appreciation.  We find life in giving love which gives life.
The Crucifix magnifies Jesus final words: “It is finished.”    All the preoccupation with sin, guilt and punishment was now over.  “It is finished.”  A new agenda is ours: “Thy Kingdom come, Thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven.”  We are called to bring heaven to earth.  We are called to build the Kingdom through love.  Sin is forgiven.  Loving-kindness is now our agenda, our mission.


Tears of Sadness Turn to Joy

Anna asked to see me in her waning hours.  Lung cancer was shortening her life radically at a young age.  She was only 47 years old, a hard-working single mother.  Today she was having difficulty breathing, and with a tube in her nose talking was not easy either.

What Anna said went like this: "I'm in so much pain, I can't keep my mind on Jesus."  Tears welled up in her eyes as she talked.  "I'm afraid I can't hang on to God and that scares me.  I feel so weak and I'm thinking about my children and feeling so troubled over much of my life."  Then the tears poured out:  "I'm afraid I wont have enough faith to go to heaven!"

She shared a few more thoughts and I mostly listened with brief comments showing I was hearing and understanding her deep anxiety.  Then I realized she was very tired and needed to hear from me about her fear.

"Anna," I said slowly, holding her hand in mine, "God holds on to you.  You do not have to hold on to God."  I paused and waited for the words to sink in.  "God will never leave you or forsake you.  Please relax and let that promise embrace and comfort you."

I then prayed slowly emphasizing those truths trying to saturate her soul with confidence and security and change her fear to joy.

I cannot adequately describe the look on Anna's face.  It became totally peaceful, with a slight incredulous smile as well.  Something enormous had changed in her.  Then with tears of joy she said "That is so good!  I have never heard such promises.   That is so good!  Thank you.  Thank you. Thank you."  Then she closed her eyes and went to sleep.

Placebo


PLACEBO
( It is Faith Healing )

Pla-ce’-bo (plÃ¥-sÄ“’-bÅ‘), n. [Latin, “I shall please.”]  Med. A medicine, esp. an inactive one, given merely to satisfy a patient.
                                                            Webster’s New Collegiate Dictionary, copyright, 1961

-                      A medication prescribed more for the mental relief of the patient than for its actual effect on his disorder.
Webster’s New Collegiate Dictionary, copyright, 1979

The mention of a placebo makes people smile.  It is the smile of a shared secret.  It connotes a beneficial little trick pulled on the not-really-sick.  The placebo technique involves giving a pill to trick the complainer into thinking something truly medicinal has been prescribed.  Believing it is true medicine many have been fooled into feeling better.  At least that’s how we have in the past thought about the placebo.  Recent research indicates there’s much more to it than fooling people.

Apparently when the placebo is taken by trusting patients, it actually causes the body to heal itself.  When the sick, or injured person pops the placebo pill into his system, the body can produce chemicals called endorphins.  One of these endorphis is a pain killer more powerful than morphine.  Pain is then reduced or eliminated by the body’s own chemicals, the production of which was stimulated by the placebo taken in “faith”.

The body can heal itself.  The self-healing capacity of our human system is being stressed more and more by medical leaders.  The placebo research underscores it in a striking way.  It shows that pulling the right trigger can initiate self-healing.

Throughout all of history healing has occurred in ways that defy modern science’s explanation.  While some healing may come straight from God, other recoveries may come through the mysterious miracles of faith in a practitioner, an herb, a touch, a spiritual event that triggers the self-healing potential of the human body.  That is a miracle of God too.

The trusting patient can be helped and even healed by a placebo, in the form of a medicine.   Obviously faith in the healing power of God, the hand of a praying person, or a drop of olive oil, can also release, trigger, or speed up healing in the sick or wounded person.

Primitive people have always responded to “unscientific” healing ventures.  Civilized Americans who have trusted science above all can hardly be helped by anything but the productions of laboratories.  Now as we see the evidence of the body’s self-healing capacities even modern people may find that faith can heal.  We may begin again to ask that the elders lay their hands on us, pray over us, and put the oil on us. Such love, care, attention, may trigger the healing process God has created within us.

People Need People


People Need People

What does this mean?  “Where two or three are gathered in my name, there I am present.”  They are the words of Jesus.  Is it just a description of a potent reality or is there more to it?

On the one hand it is saying that when we are gathered together in small groups The Lord is present with us.  However it would be an error to just leave it as a description.  It is also a prescription.  The words tell us we ought to get together in small groups because there is a special effect in those kind of gatherings.

Realizing this is a prescription we come to the understanding that in small groups the healing and helping presence of Christ Jesus becomes effective.  Such beneficial occasions are the result of the reality that Christ is in each of us and being with each other makes a positive difference.

Prayer is a powerful and necessary resource in our lives but a great amount of healing , renewal and restoration comes through being with others who care and encourage us.  Listening, forgiving, accepting are healing modalities.  And they are facilitated by people near us.

Sometimes we act as if God’s love comes through Bible verses, Christian truths and ideas.  We sometimes act as if the hurting person needs to get her facts straight or he needs clearer understanding of certain truths.  Far more powerful and healing is the presence of a caring friend or two.  “Weep with those who weep” the Bible advises.  There is where healing happens.  Not by getting better understanding.

That is what the church must be, a group who hurt with each other and laugh with each other.  It must be people who are “we” not “he” and “me”.  Just “we”.  That is the body of Christ.  We feel with each other.  And when we gather together and hear each other’s stories, healing happens.    



 

Combating Ageism--Six Suggestions

Ageism is an attitude or outlook that discounts and belittles the older years, and those of that age.

Suggestions for Taking a Different Approach:

1.  Discontinue even playfully fibbing or denying your true chronological age.

2.  Praise, honor, and show esteem openly to those who reach milestones of advanced age.

3.  Eliminate quips that knock and mock older age.  Regard such comments as inappropriate.  They are like racist or vulgar words.

4.  Seek the company of older people.  Treasure their observations, opinions, and advice.  Ask older folks to share their story with you.

5.  Select and elect older people for church and community leadership positions.

6.  Change your mind about aging.  Perceive it as a new opportunity rich with new rewards and discoveries.

A Proverb in the Bible says:  "Gray hair is a crown of splendor."

Aging Insights

"How Older People Feel and How they Think about Being Older"


90% are fairly well satisfied with their lives
83% feel they make a good impression
82% say they have gotten what they expected out of life
65% say things seem better than they expected
75% disagree if told this is a dreary time of life

MOST do not get down in the dumps, but instead look forward to good things.
MOST SAY “I’m just as happy as when I was younger.”

MOST say “these are the best years of my life.”
ONLY 5% require nursing home care, ever.

Smile ! A Care and Kindness Concept

         Big Smile, Long Life
                                                                     
People who smile a lot are usually happier, have more stable personalities, more stable marriages, better cognitive skills and better interpersonal skills, according to research. Science has  just uncovered another benefit of a happy face. People who have big smiles live longer.   
Researchers at Wayne State University used information from the Baseball Register to look at photos of 230 players who began their careers in professional baseball before 1950. The players' photos were enlarged, and a rating of their smile intensity was made (big smile, no smile, partial smile). The players smile ratings were compared with data from deaths that occurred from 2006 through 2009. The researchers then correc­ted their analysis to account for other factors associated with longevity, such as body mass index, career length, career precocity and college attendance.                                 |§j
For players who had died, the researchers found longevity ranged from an average of 72.9 years for players with no smiles (63 players) to 75 years for players with partial smiles (64 players) to 79.9 years for players with big smiles (23 players).
This isn’t a bunch of psycho-hooey, the authors said. Smiles reflect positive emotion, which is linked to   physical and mental well-being. But they added: "The data source provided no infor­mation as to whether expressions were spontaneous or in response to a photographer's request to smile. "Still, big smiles are more likely to reflect true happiness than partial smiles.     /
Maybe non-smilers were thinking about their batting averages.
shari.roan@latimes.com

!0 Tips for Helping a Hurting Person

1.  Listen.  That is help them talk about what happened and how they are feeling.

2.  Notice the feelings they are having and talking about.  Feelings are more important than the facts.

3.  Do not try to fix them.

4.  Your body and face should look interested and attentive.

5.  Repeat in words what you see and hear them to be feeling.  Their emotions are most important.

6.  "Name the elephant."  This means you speak of sensitive issues of which you are aware.  You do not avoid sensitive subjects.

7.  "Check Your Story at the Door."  Avoid slipping into talking about your own experiences, some of which might be similar to theirs.  When you do that they may be politely listening to you ionstead of you listening to them.

8.  Pray personally.  That is focus on the crisis and the person's needs and hurts.  Touch, holding the other person's hands, often is meaningful.

9.  Allow, accept, encourage tears.(your own as well as theirs).  The Bible says "weep with those who weep."

10.  Avoid "pat answers", cf. # 3 above "Do not try to fix them".

P.S. Trust the healing presence and love of Jesus.  Healing will happen.   

You Are Far More Than You Think You Are !

The newly installed hospital chaplain, a middle age pastor, exclaimed "I don't have anything to offer her."  He said this as he talked about visiting an extremely ill woman in his hospital.  His words irritated me intensely.

I exploded.  "How can you say such a thing?  You are a Giver of Life, Lifter of Spirits, Healer of Wounds." 
He looked knocked speechless by my outburst.  The words had leaped from my heart because they are realities every one of us must know about ourselves. I had not thought out what I said.  The description just poured out.

That Pastor was speaking for thousands.  He was saying what most people think about themselves in relation to others, especially the hurting. They believe that unless there is some profound wisdom they can share, or insightful sentences they can speak, or maybe a Biblical quote to leave, they have nothing to offer.

Bumper stickers are no longer in fashion but I would like to put this one on every automobile:  I Am a Giver of Life, Lifter of Spirits, Healer of Wounds.  I don't like tatoos very much or I would suggest the same words be tatooed on every forhead.  Because that is what we are!  That is part of what it means to be "the light of the world."  That is our agenda every day, everywhere we gho, with everyone we meet.

Three phrases, twelve words, that encapsulate our entire spiritual agenda.  That is what Jesus wants us to know about ourselves.  When we enter that room, meet a person who is sad or sick, walk with a grieving friend or neighbor we are powerful important and valuable medicine for their souls-just by being there and demonstrating the love of showing up.

The Church of the Horizontal

    “The Church of the Horizontal—is where I was converted to Jesus.”  When I was speaking to a Presbyterian group in Waterloo, Iowa recently, a man told me about his friend’s spiritual experience.  He never went to church with his wife.  He stayed in bed.  One morning while still on his back, he tuned in to The Hour of Power.  It was a total life-changing event.  He gave his life to Christ, and abandoned The Church of The Horizontal forever.



Leave an Inheritance that Matters

What would you do if you knew you had only thirty days to live?  Such a question sends our minds running. My own answer gravitates toward spending time with loved ones.  Such relationships seem to matter most.

If the divine voice told you to put your house in order would you clean out the garage?   Or would you review your financial issues, read your last will and testament, and list the texts and hymns for your funeral?  Perhaps you would write a letter to each of your special loved ones as a parting gift to them.

What would you say in your parting memo to loved ones?  Work hard, read widely, travel, be generous, value friendships?  Let care and kindness flow from your heart?  Or maybe I would apologize and endeavor to fix any broken  place I could think of., straighten out misunderstandings left too long.

Finally I would try to let myself soak in the love of Jesus while dumping all my failures, mistakes and sins..  I'd just fill my heart and soul with Handel's Messiah, especially The Hallelujah chorus, and other messages of heavenly affection in musical form, confident my house was in order.

What is Good About Life?

I made a quick mental run through my week just ending and made a striking discovery.  Although intensely involved in some important projects and sensitive pastoral concerns, the heart-warming points in my week took place  in our back yard.

Two tidbits stood out.  One was the discovery of delicious figs ripening on our tree.  It happens every year but here it is happening again.  The second pleasing moment occurred when I turned over a heavyu, broken chunk of concrete and stood looking eye to eye at a little lizard.

A jam-packed week of relationships, challenges, struggling and thriving people and my highlights were ripening figs and a creepy crawler.  The last two won the prize.

The heavy things of life move us, teach us and deepen us, sometimes profoundly.  But singing God's goodness, celebrating  life's richness, skipping for joy over God's faithfulness often springs from the small joys of everyday.  A flower, a friendship, a child, music, or a little lizard can spark our joy like nothing else, sometimes.

Life is God's Gift

Disbelief, shock, then anger are the initial responses to a personal announcement of imminent death.
It is rarely an acceptable diagnosis.  I want to live! Here! Physically! 

A short time ago my wife and I traveled over the rocky road of breast cancer which carried a major surgical part, chemotherapy and reconstructive surgery.  Never did she, or I, regard this as a death warrant.  We responded with aggressive tactics aimed to deny death any chance of winning.  Hezekah too fought as best he knew how to live.  He too had a powerful love of life and wanted badly to go on living.


Life is God's gift.  It is not an insignificant holding time. There will come a time when, with a sigh, approaching death may be acceptable, maybe a relief welcomed and even longed for.  Until then, however, death is an enemy to be opposed, stalled, and blocked every way we can. 

Life is a Gift We Must Use Every Day and Cherish with all Our Heart.

There is nothing like facing one's own death.  The focus of one's mind at such times can be amazing.  I have observed this as a Pastor walking alongside.  Most, however, embrace death the way they embrace life.  Some are matter-of-fact, or see it a s a challenge.  Others live in denial acting like it isn't really going to happen.  Many spiritualize the prospect of moving into the presence of Jesus, and smile (often smiling through their tears).  A few are depressed and resentful.  Most quietly resign themselves and accept what is coming.

Death challenges God's people like walking on a high-wire.  We need to balance love of life as we know it with the incredible prospect of heaven. Life is a gift, and we are entrusted with it as partners with Jesus in making the world a better place.  Our earthly life is not a mere passing-through.  We are "the light of the world" and expected towork at and enjoy brightening the world, in any small way we can.  We are to fight for life.  Heaven can wait.  There is work to do, relationships to tend to, beauty to be celebrated, wonders to behold, and innovations and improvements to conceive.  Life is a gift and an assignment..

The Hospice Movement

Hospice care is one of the most helpful and wonderful gifts to human life imaginable.  Hospice care brings pain relief, loving-kindness and dignity to those whose life is coming to an end.  Instead of tubes, machines and desperate procedures trying to keep a person alive, the person rests comfortably in familiar surroundings encircled by loving friends and family.

That is where I met Joyce.  She was already well along in her life -endiong illness.  But we talked.  Her mind was clear and her smile cheering but she was thin and ebbing away.  Then as I held her hand a beautiful scene flashed into my mind.  Joyce, I suddenly saw as a cocoon and emerging  and then floating upward was a beautiful butterfly.  A sad ending turned into a pleasant beginning.

Stories have trickled in for decades about the beautiful moments surrounding death-angels, comforting voices, warmth, love and more.  The end of life for many is not bleak and difficult.

But King Hezekiah wasn't ready for death.  Life in this world challenged and called him.  So he cried  and cried  out to God for a reprieve. There is a time to fight for life and there is a time to let go.  The tears of this King touched the heart of God.

Jesus Loves Me This I Know

Look at this Biblical text:  "In those days Hezekiah (king)  became ill and was at the point of death.  The prophet Isaiah said to him:  "This is what the Lord says -'Put your house in order ... you are going to die; you will not recover.'"  II Kings 20:1-11

Hezekiah turned his face to the wall and prayed. these words:  "Remember, O Lord how I have walked before you faithfully and with whole-hearted devotion.  I have done what is good in your eyes."  The Hezekiah wept.

Before Isaiah had left the temple, the word of the Lord came to him:  "Go back and tell Hezekiah...'I have heard your prayer and seen your tears.  I will heal you.  I will add fifteen years to your life.  And I will deliver you from the hand of the King of Assyria.'"  Then Isaih said "Prepare a poultice of figs."  They did so and applied it to the boil, and he recovered.

The most remarkable revelation here is God saying "I have seen your tears."

The important bottom line here is that God is touched by our distress.  God is moved by human cries and heartache.

The love and life of Jesus is all about that enormous reality--God loves us so much our distress, our confusion, our anguish breaks his heart.  And he gives us his love totally for our healing and well-being.

Excessive Ego Attachment

EGO DETACHMENT
Inability to speak your opinions and ideas in public is often due to a simple problem.  Ego attachment.  The solution is detachment.
It’s as if your idea or what you’d like to say is you.  Your worthwhileness as a person is connected to a mere thought or point of view.  So if it is ignored, disapproved of, or voted down, you go down with it.  When your well-being as a human being is dependent on others “applauding” or liking what you say, it’s obvious you will be very careful.  You will be reluctant to speak.  You will be frightened to express yourself.
Paralyzed in this way by fear you will keep many good thoughts to yourself.  Resentment, jealousy, hostility, depression may follow.  A kind of sickness of spirit from excessive ego attachment.  Too much mistaken notion that your value as a person is dependent on being “right on”.
Recognizing this you can begin to detach your ego from your statements.  Realizing that your value is independent of people liking or even listening to what you have to say, you can begin to contribute.
Usually this means beginning by overriding a lot of feelings with a determination to do what you are now convinced is true.  In spite of fear, uneasiness, apprehension – breaking out into a new involvement, a gratifying fresh creativeness.
Jesus said “Woe to you when all people think well of you . . .”  Luke 6:26

God Heals. You Show Up.

God Heals
(But God sincerely requests your gracious assistance)

It should be engraved on the mind of every warmhearted and softhearted follower of Jesus that God heals the broken hearted and you do not have to try to do it.  If there is healing needed God, will take care of it.  All we have to do is “show up.”

We all know those who have come back to life after being “hit by a freight train”.  Some we know have come through the most dreadful tragedies imaginable and now years later once again smile, laugh, dance, and sing.  It is never right away.  And it is never singing without a deep pain in one corner of their heart.  But they do come back to life.

Our place is to be there, confidently and patiently allowing God to work healing while we walk along side- listening, mingling our tears with theirs, praying, hugging.  This means resisting our impulses to try to fix them.  It means resisting our logical explanations and theological perspectives that proclaim why this happened, or how it can be softened.   

What a Prayer Looks Like

What Prayer Looks Like

I visualize prayer like an enormous triangle.  The top peak is God, and the extreme bottom left point is the one speaking the prayer. The third, and remaining point, is the man or woman for whom a prayer is being said.  Then I visualize the bottom two lines going out from  myself, the one offering prayer.  One goes up to God. The other extends, on the vertical level, to the one in need.  I look up to God, and over to the one for whom the prayer is being spoken. 

In my mind I see two lines flowing down from God.  One goes to the one for whom the prayer is being offered. The other comes from God back down to me, the pray-er.  The line, from God, that goes to the one in need is God’s energy and love streaming to that person.  The line that goes from God through me is God’s love and energy flowing back to the one needing prayer. Directly and through me God’s love and energy goes out.  Both target the loved one for whom supplication and intercession is being offered.

The astounding part of this picture is God’s healing love flowing through me, the one doing the praying.  The help of God doesn’t exclusively come directly from God to the hurting person. It also comes straight through me, the one calling on God, for the needed help.

The Christian Bear Hunter

The Christian Bear Hunter

Have you heard the story about the Christian Bear Hunter? 

Well, there was this very devout man who annually went bear hunting.   When the season rolled around, he put on his boots and jacket, picked up his gun, prayed for success, and drove off to the woods.

Walking quietly, deep in the forest, before he knew what hit him, he was clobbered by a mighty Grizzly.  His gun flew, and he found himself lying on the ground looking up at the Grizzly.  Weaponless, he cowered as the bear appeared ready to strike again.  Helpless, the nimrod closed his eyes and prayed:  "Oh Lord, change the bear's heart.  Convert his ways.  Make him into a Christian bear."

Suddenly, he heard a voice.  He opened his terrified eyes. There was the bear, paws together, eyes closed, head bowed, praying, "Lord, bless this food I'm about to eat."

An Angel at Cobmoosa Shores?


“An Angel Experience? Or a Coincidence?”

We were sleeping at a cottage at Cobmoosa Shores, near Stony Lake, and facing Lake Michigan.  Only Linda and I were there to sleep that night, but the previous day a couple of little grandchildren had been around. Their toys were lying here and there.

Early that Saturday morning we awakened to the music of one of the little wind-up toys. It played “Are you sleeping, are you sleeping, Brother John, Brother John, morning bells are ringing, morning bells are ringing, Ding Ding Dong, Ding Ding Dong.”  It played it through completely, then stopped.  Since it had awakened us, to smiles, I checked the time, saw it was 6:00 A.M., and decided to get up and make coffee.

At 9:00 that morning the telephone rang.  It was Nancy, Linda’s Step-mother.  Linda  answered the phone, and she seemed rather serious in her manner as she listened and responded.  When she hung up she told me “My Dad died this morning at 6:00 o’clock.”

Immediately I thought of the way we had awakened at 6:00 A.M.  It was with a happy little song at the moment of Leo’s death.

Were the Angels playing with the toys?

"The Price of an Unpaid Speeding Ticket"

FEAR AND ILL-HEALTH
“The price of an unpaid speeding ticket.”

In 1958 I left Kalamazoo, Michigan where I was working as a vocational rehabilitation counselor to go to seminary in Philadelphia.  Irked by an “improper passing” ticket a state trooper issued shortly before, I departed with the fine unpaid.  They won’t come to Pennsylvania to get me, I reasoned.  But I also knew my name to be on the great Michigan police computer and that I would be returning or passing through.  Nevertheless, I ignored my summons and forgot about it.

Then, a year later, came the first occasion to return to Michigan.  As I approached Toledo, Ohio I suddenly recalled that I was a “wanted” person in Michigan.  FEAR!!  My whole body changed.  Muscles tightened, stomach churned, heart raced, mouth dried, and my mind worked feverishly while my eyes were hyper-vigilant.

What havoc and damage fear can do to the human person.  Fear is now recognized as one of the greatest accelerators of disease.  To rightly work at prevention and cure of some illnesses, then, we do well to look at the presence of fear in our hearts.

Some fear, such as mine back then, can be eliminated by repenting and making proper amends to remove the real threat.  What a foolish high price we often pay for a few dollars or some momentary pleasure.  We actually jeopardize our health in exchange.

Beyond our foolish fears from sins and errors, real or imagined, there are the deep existential fears.  We might even call them terrors.  The question of death is the root of some.  But also the fear of meaninglessness.  Is my life worthwhile?  Do I matter?  Am I a good person?

There are spiritual answers for these potentially health-eroding agonies.  One immediate spiritual resource is the love and reassurance of people.  The care and kindness of others can heal and help enormously.  The ultimate healer is a thorough immersion in perfect love.  God is love.  Perfect love drives out fear.  (I John 4:18)  Reduce fear, feel better!

PS:  Yes, I was caught.  The great computer got me a couple of years later when I renewed my driver’s license in Michigan.  Oh yes, I did pay a price more than dollars for carrying that ticket so long?



Faith and a Good Night's Sleep

IT’S EASIER TO LIVE BY FAITH IF YOU’VE HAD A GOOD NIGHT’S SLEEP

Sometimes cutting short your sleep to commune with God may, in fact, undermine your ability to live close to God.  A tired person is more vulnerable to temptations than the wide-awake.  The weakened body is more apt to be plagued with devil-pleasing self-doubt than one fed and rested.

Quiet times for prayer, meditation and reflection aid the Christian walk, but the notion that “more of the same” will continue to produce positive results is faulty.

The spiritual growth we aspire to cannot take place separate from sound care for the whole person.  Holistic ideas about the interconnection of spirit and body are surprisingly common sensical when we see it this way:

·        It’s easier to feel close to God when the Excedrin has taken my headache away.

·        Faith soars when the air is fresh and I’m biking briskly on a bright spring morning.

·        After a cup of coffee my spiritual condition is always improved.

Spiritual inspiration and enthusiasm can be mediated by physical interventions and activities.  This being true, faith builders will not only implore their adherents to worship in the traditional forms, including Bible study, prayer, meditation and song.  They will also encourage (Excedrin?  Caffeine?) the health-care of the body, spirit, and emotions. Exercise, vacations and travel, hospitality, friendship, good-deed projects, enjoyment of the arts help us spiritually. Folk-dance, the appreciation of beauty in nature,  fine craftsmanship, ecological conscientiousness (harmony with nature-creation), reading, hobbies, gardening, are good for our closeness with God.

Since we know that “everything affects everything else” we will design a well-rounded life-style.  A life free of guilt that some pastimes while well-enjoyed may be look unspiritual.  Spirit-raising pastimes bring us closer to God-pleasing service.