Final Four Kindness Suggestions
(plus a bonus thought)
1. Look at People! Notice and remark about--clothing, jewelry, pins, haircuts, even scars or disabilities. Ask, inquire, lament, comment, praise, appreciate: “Interesting pin.” “Great colors.” “I love your car.” “Sharp tie.” “That’s quite a scar on your arm, how’d that happen?”
2. Use Names. Remember Names. Write them down to lock the names in. Use them as much as possible. “Good morning Harry.” “Have a good day Gerry.” Ask for names. Don’t stop asking until you remember it. Embarrassment must not keep us from asking for the name, still another time.
3. Give a Well-Wishing Farewell. “Good to see you today.” Or “It has been a pleasure meeting with you today.” Even if it is merely a committee meeting, or a consultation with one or two persons, leave saying appreciative words about being with them. Start a routine, when you leave a gathering, to declare clearly—“I really enjoyed being with you today.” My parting sentence with many, after some kind of transaction is over and they say “have a great day,” is to answer “I will, and you just made it better.”
4. Return Phone Calls. As promptly as possible, and certainly the same day. Never leave people hanging when a quick effort can connect you with them, and relieve them of wondering and waiting for your reply. Also, acknowledge e-mail messages and forwards. Just say “thank you.
5. Touch. Hug. (caution!). Touching someone’s hand, or laying a hand on their shoulder, or shirt sleeve, can be a caring gesture. It is usually a positive. But not all touch is appreciated. Some touch is inappropriate. Touch with care.
Note: Not everybody hugs or likes to be hugged. Offer hugs with close attention to the other’s body language which says “yes” or “no”. Hugging is an increasingly welcomed gesture. Each of us can grow more and more comfortable and confident by frequent but tentative practice.
(The first eight appeared in earlier Blogs)
(plus a bonus thought)
1. Look at People! Notice and remark about--clothing, jewelry, pins, haircuts, even scars or disabilities. Ask, inquire, lament, comment, praise, appreciate: “Interesting pin.” “Great colors.” “I love your car.” “Sharp tie.” “That’s quite a scar on your arm, how’d that happen?”
2. Use Names. Remember Names. Write them down to lock the names in. Use them as much as possible. “Good morning Harry.” “Have a good day Gerry.” Ask for names. Don’t stop asking until you remember it. Embarrassment must not keep us from asking for the name, still another time.
3. Give a Well-Wishing Farewell. “Good to see you today.” Or “It has been a pleasure meeting with you today.” Even if it is merely a committee meeting, or a consultation with one or two persons, leave saying appreciative words about being with them. Start a routine, when you leave a gathering, to declare clearly—“I really enjoyed being with you today.” My parting sentence with many, after some kind of transaction is over and they say “have a great day,” is to answer “I will, and you just made it better.”
4. Return Phone Calls. As promptly as possible, and certainly the same day. Never leave people hanging when a quick effort can connect you with them, and relieve them of wondering and waiting for your reply. Also, acknowledge e-mail messages and forwards. Just say “thank you.
5. Touch. Hug. (caution!). Touching someone’s hand, or laying a hand on their shoulder, or shirt sleeve, can be a caring gesture. It is usually a positive. But not all touch is appreciated. Some touch is inappropriate. Touch with care.
Note: Not everybody hugs or likes to be hugged. Offer hugs with close attention to the other’s body language which says “yes” or “no”. Hugging is an increasingly welcomed gesture. Each of us can grow more and more comfortable and confident by frequent but tentative practice.
(The first eight appeared in earlier Blogs)
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